Rituals Week 3: Achieving Goals
by Peter Benson, MA, LMFT

We have all done the New Year’s resolution routine that only lasts weeks … or months if we are dedicated. If you stop and really consider why your resolution didn’t get achieved, it can be traced back to forgetting why this thing was so important to us. Can’t remember why waking up at 5am to go running is so important when our bed is so warm. Can’t remember why losing weight is so important when we are out with friends and the dessert menu is passed around. Can’t remember why ……. Forgetting is a problem.

Rituals

As mentioned in week 1 of this series (if you haven’t read it, go back and give it a read), rituals help us to remember. Rituals can be helpful in finding consistency and success in fulfilling our New Year’s resolutions and any other goals we might be setting.

Give It a Try

Try establishing a ritual. The ritual is there to help us remember why our goal is important; consider it the kindling that lights the fire of motivation in completing the goal. If my goal is to wake up 45 minutes earlier and go for a run 3 times per week I may establish a ritual getting my running gear together the night before (something I have tried that has been effective). If my goal is to be more positive I might establish a ritual of sharing gratitude with my partner each morning. If my goal is to make more time for my partner, I might establish a ritual of making them a nice cup of coffee or hot chocolate each night after the kids are in bed. It can be as simple as reciting a phrase in the shower each day or giving your son a high five every morning. It just needs to help us remember why our goal is important.

What About You?

What is your goal? Why is it important to you? What ritual will you establish to help you remember the importance of this goal? There it is. Give it a try. Establish ONE ritual and give it a try. The key to it being effective for its intended purpose is consistency. 28 consecutive days. You can do it. Find it, share it, use it.